This is not a drill, Sumo-lings. Black Friday is just around the corner, and we’re unveiling our biggest classified operation ever to get you there in style.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to steal the Chief Sumo’s Tesla (we’re not joking) and let the world know just how dope our Black Friday lineup is.

Don’t worry, enterprising agents. You won’t be going it alone. The Steal Noah’s Tesla (and more!) Giveaway will reward other winners with Noah-approved prizes like a mountain bike, an Under Desk treadmill, a year of free tacos, and an Oculus Quest 2.

It’s truly an out of this Cyberworld* event.